Good bye, Sophia!

I know you are probably thinking I'm a little crazy to write a blog about the passing of Estelle Getty. I was inspired while watching an episode of Golden Girls. (I usually have my TV on the Lifetime channel every morning as background noise.) Well, I'm really not. I'm writing about the effects of dementia on a family. It can be hear wrenching!
I lived with my grandmother suffering her last years with it. She died when I was pregnant with Conner in December 2004. I felt so sorry for her because it was difficult for her to say what she wanted. And sometimes we would put her off because we thought she was talking "crazy". For example, there was one time she was very determined one lady in her building (when she was living in some Senior Citizen apartments) was stealing her clothes. We just put it off as her being delusional, but now I just wonder if she was actually right. I can't say she was lying because it just might have been the truth. HER truth.
That's the crazy thing about dementia, it will make you think things are true when it really isn't. It will make you forget your loved ones. It will make things difficult for you to convey. I remember seeing an interview with Rue McClanahan, Bea Arthur, and Betty White. They were having a Golden Girls reunion and the big question was, "Where was Estelle Getty?" (Sophia), well her dementia had gotten so bad that the last time the rest of the "Girls" had visited her, she barely remembered them. I'm lucky that my grandmother never got that bad.

So, I know now that my grandmother and Estelle Getty are both in a better place. A place where they can convey what they want to say. A place where their truth will be everyone's truth. A place where they don't have to be frustrated because of this awful disease.

My grandmother at my wedding June 22, 2002.